Howard Neal Grossman's Obituary
Howard Grossman peacefully passed away at age 58. Here is a posthumous message from him and deets about the upcoming fiesta to celebrate his life:
“Hey guys, it’s me, Howard. Don’t worry, I took care of everything before Grim came and got me. On Friday, I had a stroke and was taken immediately to the operating room to bust a clot (not a move, that would have been more fun). It was really strange being in a room where everyone had a mask on, but I was in no condition to ask anyone to remove them. I did, however, request AC/DC to be played as everyone in the operating room was just so serious. I also asked if they could fix my heart problem while in there, but they told me twofers were only available Monday through Thursday and I’d have to go to another hospital to check on availability of weekend specials. They seemed kinda rushed, so I let that go. Everyone was hopeful after the surgery, but things took a turn for the worse overnight. I’m not saying I was angry about that, just disappointed. I wanted to ask the surgeon: “Did I say something wrong? Did I offend you?” But I wasn’t in any position to talk. So, at this point, I’m on the edge of jumping ship, and everyone is gathering around the bed saying goodbye. You know I don’t like long goodbyes and I’m thinking: “guys, it is what it is!”, and let’s get this party started or ended as the case may be. So, I jumped, and now it’s time to party and I don’t have to pay for it. You can read all about the upcoming party (I’m calling it the “funereal fiesta”) and some other stuff below. I will be in attendance, albeit in a small box. When you arrive, know that I will be disappointed but not angry if you’re all moping around. Anyway, stop by, have fun, and reminisce with the fam.
Howard’s Funereal Fiesta:
Location: The Event Stop, 23645 Mercantile Road (Door C), Beachwood, OH 44122
Date and Time: Thursday, May 26, 2022, between 4−8 PM
Be sure to visit me at my private table; I’ll be in my box.
Some Other Stuff
Look out for my kids at the fiesta. They are, after all, my greatest accomplishment.
Daughter Michelle Wallace and her husband, Nicholas
Daughter Lisa Zima and her husband, Bryan
Son Brian Grossman and his partner, Cassi Stover
Son Jacob Hasson
My grandchildren. I feel so bonded to them, I think it’s because we have a common enemy.
Matthew Wallace, Adam Horne, Bryson Zima, Lucas Grossman, Conrad Grossman, Alivia Stover, Ava Stover.
My sister Beth Ann and her partner Michael Kartman. He’s a funny guy, we suggested he MC the whole event, but he said he was only available for weddings and Bar Mitzvahs.
My parents, Ely and Dorothy Grossman, will not be there as they are now waiting for me. We’re trying to figure out a suitable living situation once the Funereal Fiesta is over.
The love of my life, Michelle. Honey, I always loved your healthy food, those Dunkin’ Donuts and Jimmy John’s wrappers you found in the back of the truck were just some innocent client entertainment.
Okay, gotta go. Bye.”
What’s your fondest memory of Howard?
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Share a story where Howard's kindness touched your heart.
Describe a day with Howard you’ll never forget.
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